S Poddar
BBC Radio 2 DJ Jo Whiley has spoken of feeling “really lost” during perimenopause due to a lack of public conversations about the issue. The 59-year-old has now spoken of her gratitude to fellow presenter Davina McCall for bringing awareness to menopause and perimenopause, explaining how McCall’s campaigning led to meaningful conversations starting on the issue via television shows, documentaries, podcasts, and books.
Speaking to Women’s Health UK, Whiley reflected on her own personal journey through perimenopause, which just felt so isolating at the time due to the lack of mainstream conversation. “When I was going through it, I think the conversation wasn’t being had that vocally, like it wasn’t on social media with Davina and her campaign. I really lost myself,” Whiley admitted.
She painfully fought the emotional battle. “I cried all the time. I mean, I cry a lot anyway, but I cried all the time,” she said. This emotional distress weakened her, left her overwhelmed, but she attributes her regular physical exercises to helping her to get her life back in order. Going to the gym, getting myself strong, has played a really, really big part in helping me be the person I am today. It really saved me,” she shared, underscoring how physical strength helped her cope with her symptoms.
Whiley has been open about how perimenopause affected her life, including during a rough time in 2018 when her Radio 2 show with co-host Simon Mayo was criticized. This clashed with the worst time for her, as she was suffering from “brain fog,” as is common in perimenopause. The pressure to keep up with her professional duties and not let symptoms get the best of her was piling up. “I felt I couldn’t do the Drivetime show with such a lot of pressure and things to remember,” she related.
Initially, Whiley felt she could handle it without medical interference, even to the point of persuading herself she didn’t need HRT. As symptoms worsened, she finally sought help. “Until then, I’d thought: ‘I’m absolutely fine. I don’t need HRT.’ But it had got to the point where I was really struggling. I decided to try it,” she said.
The effects of perimenopause were especially tough on her professional life. “I felt I was a liability on the radio and it was a very uncomfortable feeling, not being in charge of what I was doing, suddenly grappling for words.” The cognitive difficulties were compounded by lesser-known symptoms like burning mouth syndrome, a sensation she didn’t initially connect to perimenopause. “I’ve felt rotten, which is why it’s good to talk about it. You feel less alone,” she added, underscoring open dialogue about these aspects, often not discussed in the case of menopause.
Whiley also reflected on how her symptoms have continued to cycle. Two years ago, she spoke candidly about times when, though feeling great, she could suddenly be hit by waves of low self-esteem and confidence. “I can go along and feel absolutely great, then all of a sudden I want to lock myself in a dark cave and not do anything at all because I can’t face the world,” she said in an interview with the Daily Mail this year. Those moments, characterized by physical discomfort and emotional lows, have been part of her continuing experience with menopause. “I’ll be doing all right, then it hits me: low self-esteem, low confidence. I don’t feel like myself at all. It’s quite daunting. It happens every couple of months. I don’t want to see anyone. My eyes are really sore. I get a burning mouth and tongue. I really get the wobbles.”
Whiley also spoke of societal pressures that women constantly face, especially when growing up, in her interview with Women’s Health. She referred to the “lads’ mags era” as one of the most difficult times to be a woman because of non-stop objectification and the scrutiny that came along with it. “There was so much objectification and judgment of women and their bodies,” she said. It was a ridiculous time to be a woman, but I just kept my head down and weathered the storm.”
On the other hand, she sees a shift in the younger generation of women of today, an encouraging one. She says, “I think this generation of girls still deals with a lot. There are so many crises, so much pressure, so much to worry about in the world. There’s an army of young women out there who are fearless-just absolutely fearless-and they take no prisoners, and they will be who they want to be, she said as she commended their resilience and confidence.
Whiley’s perimenopause journey underlines the urgent need to have open conversations about menopause and how it impacts the lives of women. She talked about menopause in detail, breaking a long-held silence about the subject-thus giving voice to the many women whose feelings might be similar in disorientation or overwhelming experience. Her story reminds us of community, awareness, and strength in sharing our struggles.
The interview with Jo Whiley in full is on the Women’s Health website or in the magazine from 17 September.
