Why Tom Hanks Refused the Role in When Harry Met Sally

Tom Hanks, a legendary actor known for his iconic roles, has been part of many successful films over the years. However, there was one major movie role that he turned down, and many fans still wonder why he made that decision. That movie was the classic romantic comedy When Harry Met Sally, in which the main character, Harry Burns, was played by Billy Crystal. But why didn’t Tom Hanks take on the role of Harry? To understand this, we need to look at the personal situation that Hanks was going through at the time and how it influenced his choice.

In the late 1980s, Tom Hanks was going through a tough but transformative time in his life. He had recently gone through a divorce from his first wife, Samantha Lewes. This divorce came after years of being together, and it wasn’t just about the end of a relationship, but also a shift in Hanks’ personal life. While most people going through a divorce might feel sadness or a sense of loss, Hanks felt differently. According to his wife, Rita Wilson, who shared this story in an interview on the Table for Two With Bruce Bozzi podcast, Hanks was “very happy to be not married” after the divorce. This sense of happiness and freedom was something that Hanks was relishing at the time.

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Credits: Wikicommons Frankie Fouganthin, CC BY-SA 4.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0, via Wikimedia Commons

Rita Wilson explained further that Tom Hanks had a strong feeling of liberation after the divorce, which made it difficult for him to relate to the character of Harry Burns. In the movie, Harry Burns is a man who is going through a difficult divorce. He is lonely, unsure of his future, and struggles to understand love and relationships. Hanks, on the other hand, was in a completely different emotional state. Instead of feeling sad or angry, Hanks felt content and free from the pressures of his previous marriage. He couldn’t understand why someone who had just gone through a divorce would feel anything other than happiness. This made him unable to connect with the role of Harry Burns.

In fact, Hanks found it hard to imagine playing a character who was brooding and lonely, especially when he was so happy with his own life. For Hanks, the idea of playing someone like Harry was simply not something he could relate to at that moment. He was enjoying his freedom, and the emotional weight of Harry’s character didn’t appeal to him. It was a personal choice based on where Hanks was emotionally in his life. He was not interested in portraying a character who was dealing with the same struggles that he himself was not experiencing.

As a result, Tom Hanks turned down the role of Harry Burns. This opened the door for another actor, Billy Crystal, to take on the part. Crystal’s portrayal of Harry became one of the most memorable aspects of When Harry Met Sally. His comedic timing, wit, and ability to bring depth to the character helped make the movie a classic. The film became one of the most beloved romantic comedies of all time, and Billy Crystal’s chemistry with Meg Ryan, who played Sally Albright, became legendary. The famous diner scene, in which Sally proves to Harry that women can fake an orgasm in public, is still one of the most iconic moments in film history.

While When Harry Met Sally went on to become a massive success, Hanks’ decision not to take on the role didn’t hurt his career. In fact, it was during this time that Hanks was going through a personal and professional transformation. In 1988, just a year after the release of When Harry Met Sally, Hanks married Rita Wilson. The two had met on the set of the film Volunteers, and their relationship quickly grew stronger. Hanks was enjoying his new life with Wilson, and this marriage marked the beginning of a new chapter for him. In many ways, it seemed like Hanks’ life had moved from a period of uncertainty and heartache to one of happiness and stability.

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Credits: Wikicommons Dick Thomas Johnson from Tokyo, Japan, CC BY 2.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0, via Wikimedia Commons

Looking back at the decision, it’s clear that Hanks’ choice to turn down When Harry Met Sally was deeply connected to his personal feelings at the time. He was going through a period of personal growth, finding joy in his newfound freedom, and he simply didn’t feel the need to take on a role that didn’t match his emotional state. This decision was part of what made Tom Hanks such a great actor — he didn’t just take on any role. He carefully chose projects that he could connect with, which is why he has had such a successful career in Hollywood.

In the end, even though Hanks did not star in When Harry Met Sally, his career continued to thrive. He went on to star in some of the most famous movies of the 1990s, including Forrest Gump, Cast Away, and Saving Private Ryan, earning critical acclaim and numerous awards. Meanwhile, When Harry Met Sally continued to be a fan favorite, and Billy Crystal’s performance became a defining moment in his own career. Both Hanks and Crystal went on to become two of the most respected actors of their generation.

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